This time next week I’ll be on my way to Tenerife for a few days of rest, relaxation and some much needed winter sunshine.
I’m doing all the usual holiday prep; dusting off my bikinis, slathering on the St Tropez and stocking up on reading material for the flight and anticipated lounging. The only thing that makes this holiday different to any other is that the excitement is tinged with apprehension, as this time, for the first time, I’m going it alone.
I’ve travelled alone on business many times, and have flown independently all over the place to meet up with far flung friends, so I’m not at all worried about the logistics of travelling solo, but this is the first holiday that I’ve planned and booked knowing it’s just for me. I appreciate that 5 days in a Spanish resort isn’t exactly akin to trekking the Arctic or sailing single-handedly around the world, but for someone who has always had a sketchy relationship with her own company, it’s a challenging and somewhat daunting prospect to spend several days and nights with only myself to talk to.
I’m nervous enough to have still been considering cancelling up until a few days ago, especially now I have another trip booked with friends in a couple of months time, but I knew that if I wimped out I’d beat myself up about it, so for better or for worse I’m going. I’d always rather regret something I’ve done, than something I didn’t have the balls to do.
Reactions from friends & colleagues to my upcoming jaunt have ranged from assurances that it’s courageous and exciting, to horrified exclamations of ‘Why?!’. Well the why is because I don’t have much choice right now. Of course I’d love to have a travelling companion, someone to share the adventure with, to laugh with, to reflect on the day with over dinner, and (crucially) to make sure I have adequate sun cream on my back. Unfortunately this time, with a very limited number of friends whose circumstances allow them to up and jet off, it just wasn’t to be, and I’d rather go it alone than not go at all.
I’m looking forward to the break from Jersey, soaking up some sunshine and hopefully meeting some new people along the way, but I’m also staying mindful of the anxiety I’ve written about before. I know from experience that too much time on my own can be a trigger, and that if my mood drops I can find it hard to motivate myself, so I’ve tried to get a step ahead of the game, and have already researched some fitness classes I can join at my hotel (because there’s no better mood boost) and booked an adventurous activity for each day that will force me into the outside world, whether I’m in the mood for it or not.
So in a matter of days I’ll be paragliding, sailing, kayaking with dolphins, snorkelling with turtles and rounding it all off with a day at one of the top-rated spas in Spain. All that and plenty of lazing in the sun should be enough to keep me busy for 4 days. The evenings might be a little harder to fill, but so long as I have my kindle and a few things downloaded on Netflix, I’ll get by. A few early nights might even do me good.
I’m sure I’ll be documenting my adventures & keeping up with the outside world on social media whilst I’m away, so keep your eye on my instagram @mswannabean for shameless holiday spam, and watch this space for a holiday blog when I’m back.
If you’ve holidayed alone before, I’d welcome hearing about your experience.